What I’ve Learned Writing This Blog

After nearly a decade, I finally get to be a mom!  In just over a month, my sweet daughter will be born, and I cannot be more grateful to anyone than I am to the kind, caring and mature Birthmom for giving hubby and me the chance of a lifetime!

So, in writing this blog in the last two years, and observing obnoxious and unfit parents, I’ve learned a few things about parenting.  If you’ve been keeping up with this column, you’ll recognize these things…if not, read the Sahmmy archives to catch up!

1)      Not that I would, but should I ever cheat on my husband, I will not have my child call him “Uncle!”

2)      I will not purchase lingerie with my child present (with “Uncle” too!)

3)      I will never force feed my child anything, especially in public.

4)      I will teach my child proper English and politeness (unlike certain shoppers I’ve met).

5)      I will be sure my child has an appropriate nickname!

6)      I will have a proper, appropriate and honest sex talk with my child.

7)      When the time comes for my daughter’s first bra, I will not humiliate her by measuring her in the middle of the aisle at Wal-Mart with a tape measure I just got from hardware!

8)      I will never put my child on a leash!

9)      I am well aware that Pepsi is not an appropriate antiseptic for a cut!

10)  I will NEVER EVER let my child think she is not wanted, and I sure as hell will NEVER EVER tell her she is not wanted!  I will make sure she always knows how very, very, very much she is wanted!

This is just a short list of the things I have learned about parenting from observing bad parents.  I’m sure I can’t do everything perfectly, but at least I’ve got a start on what not to do!

I am thrilled beyond words as I anxiously await the long-anticipated arrival of my daughter.  I cannot wait!